


I'm Almost Me Again

by rey_of_sunlight



Category: Cyberpunk 2077 (Video Game)
Genre: Affectionate Insults, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angsty V, Banter, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Insults, Porn with Feelings, Racism, Riding, Sexism, Slap Slap Kiss, Spoilers, Teasing, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-14 08:14:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28792254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rey_of_sunlight/pseuds/rey_of_sunlight
Summary: Three scenes from V's life, as she learns to work with Johnny Silverhand, figures out what he means to her, and bangs out her feelings for him.(That last bit wasn't part of the plan.)
Relationships: Johnny Silverhand/Female V, Judy Alvarez/Female V
Comments: 2
Kudos: 67





	I'm Almost Me Again

‘They’re for my _health_ ,’ says V.

Johnny Silverhand holds the pills above her head, dangling them, then snatching them away just as she reaches for them. ‘They make me disappear. Not happening.’

‘You’ll come back,’ V reminds him. ‘I’m not gonna, eventually, but you always will.’

‘That’s defeatist talk,’ Johnny says. ‘That’s corpo talk. Didn’t think you were some bootlicking corpo-slut.’

‘’S the truth.’

Johnny throws the pill bottle from hand to hand. ‘If you really think that’s the truth, why are you fighting me so much for these?’

V’s hands curl into fists, her heart hammering. ‘Listen. I’ll take my evening dose, and you’ll disappear while I sleep, but I’ll skip my morning dose so you can come out during the day. Deal?’

Johnny pauses, then tosses them over. ‘Deal. Fuck, if they told me my forever was gonna be spent with a stick up my ass, I’d have begged them to delete me then and there.’

V flips him the bird as she swallows her pill.

***

‘Order the tequila.’

‘Nah.’ V nods her thanks at the bartender as she picks up her bottle of beer. ‘Need to be sharp tonight, don’t wanna go on the hard stuff.’

‘Always played my best tunes after the _real_ liquor,’ Johnny says.

V takes a gulp of beer. ‘Always played your best tunes according to _you_. You were so sloshed in the memories I saw that you wouldn’t have been able to tell a C sharp from a D flat.’

‘Since when do you know the difference between a C sharp and a D flat?’

‘Since you camped out in my head,’ V says. ‘Having your memories means having all your music stuff too.’

‘Oh yeah?’ Johnny folds his arms, leaning against the wall. ‘Prove it. Play one of my songs on that guitar, right now.’

V’s eyes settle on the electric guitar he’s pointing out. It’s not one of his antique models, meaning it’ll take its power from her implants; she won’t need to plug it in. The drumbeat of a challenge settles in her stomach, like the moment in a gig just before she starts shooting. She sets down her beer, strides towards it and picks it up.

‘What song?’ she says, flashing a fuck-you grin.

Johnny looks over his sunglasses. ‘ _Arasaka’s an Ass_.’

‘Always were one for the subtle touch.’ She picks it up and holds it the way she’s seen other guitarists – at least, the way she _thinks_ she’s seen them hold it. Which hand goes on the neck? Which strums the strings? Which strings _do_ you strum? She runs her fingers experimentally across the strings, and jumps as the amps let out an unholy screech. The day that’ll be classed as music, the Afterlife will run out of customers.

Across the room, Johnny’s laughing his ass off so hard he’s crying. And V’s laughing too, and nobody else in the bar can see or understand why.

***

V looks out at Night City from her apartment window. From this high up, the place looks almost beautiful; an ever-changing stream of colours and lights, like a BD made for kids.

Johnny materialises and stands beside her. ‘Whatcha thinking?’

‘Why ask when you always know?’

‘I like seeing you squirm when you say it.’

‘Fuck you,’ she says, but there’s no real venom behind it, and the conversation lapses into silence.

‘Fine,’ she says eventually. ‘I’m horny. I’m horny and I don’t wanna die without coming, hard, at least one more time.’

‘So go see a joytoy.’

‘Not gonna cheat on Judy.’

‘Go see Judy, then.’

‘Can’t.’ V pauses. ‘Judy’s too...good. Too pure.’

‘She didn’t seem that pure when she was rubbing her spicy Latina ass all over you.’ Johnny grins like a wolf. ‘Gotta say, I always liked women blonde and brainless, but that feistiness has got something going for it.’

‘Leave that shit in 2020,’ V says, this time with vehemence. ‘Judy doesn’t deserve your racist crap, and from what I’ve seen, Alt was a long way from brainless. Just ’cause you think the world revolves around you and your dick - ’

‘Okay, okay.’ Johnny holds up his hands, mock-backing away from V. ‘Your body, your rules. So what’s the problem with Judy?’

V blows out a breath, but doesn’t push it further. ‘I love her, but...I know I’m gonna die. It’s been this long and I still haven’t found a cure. How much of a chance have I got, really? And the more time I spend with her - ’

‘The more she gets attached?’

‘Yeah.’ V drums her fingernails against the windowsill. ‘That, and...I feel different from her, now. Different from everyone, ever since you showed up. I’ve died and I’ve come back to life, and I’ve found out stuff nobody in Night City is supposed to know – and I’m a merc, you know? I’m a merc, and she’s an artist, and a do-gooder, and an idealist fighting for what’s right, and that’s _really fucking hot_ , but it also makes her...better than me.’

(V doesn’t look Johnny in the eye, for that last part.)

She’s expecting Johnny to laugh, or to confirm her insecurities, but instead there’s a thoughtful pause before he speaks. First time for everything. ‘And you don’t want to make love to someone you love. You want to fuck.’

‘...Yeah.’

Johnny moves closer, leaning right beside her on the windowsill. ‘I could help.’

‘Wait, what?’

‘You heard me.’ He’s neither mocking nor fierce, just looking directly at her. ‘You’re not the only one with an itch that needs scratching, you know.’

‘Whoa, okay, I have seen way too much of you and your _itch that needs scratching_ , so - ’

‘I’m serious.’

V blinks. ‘Is that even possible?’

‘’Course it is. Arasaka knows their market. For every corpo-drone who just wants to bring back grandma, there’ll be five more who want their favourite joytoy within reach twenty-four hours a fucking day.’

‘This has to be the weirdest conversation this city has ever seen.’

‘V, this is Night City,’ Johnny says. ‘There’ll always be weirder.’

At that, V breaks into hysterical, shaky laughter, that to her shock turns into hitching sobs.

‘Hey. Hey. Come here.’ And Johnny’s arms are around her, just like that. The line of his muscles make her think of being trapped, fighting off three Maelstrom goons while three more sneak up behind her, but they’re firm without squeezing her.

She looks up at him, hating that it’s up she has to look, and remembers, despite all her recent sexual encounters being women, how fucking _much_ she likes men. ‘This isn’t some way to flatline me, is it?’

‘I’ve had easier ways to do that, haven’t I?’

Slowly, her hands find his shoulders. ‘No feelings?’

He smiles. ‘Absolutely none.’

V kisses him first. And she hates herself for it, but _God_ , now she can see why Johnny Silverhand had so many groupies. Stubble rasps against her mouth, and he tastes like nicotine and the staleness of a night out come morning. She presses her lips against his, giving as good as she gets, and satisfaction ripples through her when his hips start bucking against hers.

She breaks away, panting. ‘Give it to me.’

Johnny grins oh so slowly. ‘Give you what, exactly?’

‘Your cigarettes,’ V says, deadpan, and is rewarded with his laughter. She reaches for his zipper, but is stopped by his hand encircling her wrist.

‘I’m not gonna be the only one stripping down.’ Johnny’s hair is messed up from her hand roving through it, and his cheeks are slightly flushed. ‘You show me yours, I’ll show you mine.’

‘You’re _in my body_ ,’ says V. ‘You already know what I look like.’

‘I don’t, actually,’ Johnny says. ‘Every time you’re in the shower or getting into your bullet vest, I close my eyes.’

‘Huh.’ V’s taken aback. ‘What happened to all the womanising?’

‘I died,’ says Johnny, simply. ‘I died, and I lost Alt, and then I started sharing a body with a woman. Makes you think.’

V lets out a long breath, and lifts her tank top over her head. ‘Well then. Time to make sure you don’t have any more regrets, huh?’

‘Could say the same to you.’

She makes direct eye contact with him as she unhooks her bra. ‘Get in my body some more, then.’

***

‘So is it silver too?’

‘Ha, ha.’

They’re on the couch, their hands burrowing up and down each other’s bodies and clothes, but neither of them are all the way naked yet. V pulls the zip of Johnny’s fly down, enjoying the twitching bulge cupped in her hand and the way Johnny tips his head back as she rubs it.

Then she looks down. ‘Whoa. You were...really not exaggerating, huh?’

He shoots her a self-contented look. ‘Johnny Silverhand always delivers what he promises.’

  
V reaches for her panties, itching to get them off, but Johnny’s large hands are there before hers. He eases them down, fingers stroking across her thighs, and V moans. Even though he’s been in her body this long, she’s never felt quite so exposed as she does now, with his dark eyes roving across her.

She swings a leg over him, bracing one hand against his muscled chest while the other guides his cock. ‘C’mere.’

As she sinks down on him, they groan together, and V can’t stop herself from thrusting, and she’s blissfully, electrically alive.

***

Johnny reclines on the couch, nude and smoking yet another cigarette. The smoke curls lazily upward. V opens a bottle of water, tipping it back and relishing the cold freshness.

She wipes the droplets from her mouth with the back of her hand. ‘This make me a robot-fucker?’

‘Don’t think it counts if I’m just a construct.’

‘You’re not _just_ a construct,’ she says, too quickly. ‘You’re not _just_. I – I mean - ’

‘Aw, V, I’m flattered. You bounced on my cock one time and now you’ve got _feelings_ for me?’

‘Fuck you!’ V throws the empty water bottle at him, but of course, it goes right through him.

Johnny takes a last drag of the cigarette and stubs it out on the couch. ‘For the record, you make quite the host.’

‘Glad to hear you’re enjoying eating my brain and taking over my body.’ V meant it to come out light, but there’s a bitter edge to it that she can’t quite erase.

He gets up and crosses over to her. ‘Hey. V. We’ll find a way out of this mess.’

‘And if we don’t?’

‘Then,’ he says, ‘I die for the second time over with better memories than the first. Or I stay right beside you, till the very end.’


End file.
